Oh, fantastic - I especially like the transitions, the relentless repeating tread of the 'down you went' bits vs the bite of tax / flax, and the suspense of raged~——but!, etc. etc.
I could listen to this over and over- there's ever more satisfying nuance and oomph every time I hear it.
*draws little hearts all over its bloodthirsty relish*
Thanks! There was so much to play with here, and I had fun with the rhythm of it. And yeah, I just loved the "took their fruit in tax" and "took their souls for flax" bits in the poem. Bloodthirsty, yeah. : )
Also, the emotion you infuse into the final two 'they say' lines, and the way you then drop the volume without losing any of the intensity into the melancholy - not gentleness, exactly, more quietly sweet snick of home truth knife-like sliding in - gives me the chills every time.
Really, really well done, Luz. I am pleased silly to have my words so enriched with art.
It is fun to play around with volume! Those final lines make me shiver, and I wanted to convey that in the song. : )
I don't know if you meant it that way, but "you know not what is kind" to me meant not just that they don't know how to be kind (to other people), but that they don't know their own kind and how to relate to their own kind any more.
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branchandroot
(no subject)
Date: 2013-11-15 10:06 pm (UTC)I could listen to this over and over- there's ever more satisfying nuance and oomph every time I hear it.
*draws little hearts all over its bloodthirsty relish*
(no subject)
Date: 2013-11-15 10:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-11-15 10:28 pm (UTC)Also, the emotion you infuse into the final two 'they say' lines, and the way you then drop the volume without losing any of the intensity into the melancholy - not gentleness, exactly, more quietly sweet snick of home truth knife-like sliding in - gives me the chills every time.
Really, really well done, Luz. I am pleased silly to have my words so enriched with art.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-11-16 11:59 am (UTC)I don't know if you meant it that way, but "you know not what is kind" to me meant not just that they don't know how to be kind (to other people), but that they don't know their own kind and how to relate to their own kind any more.
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Date: 2013-11-16 02:03 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-11-16 11:59 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2013-11-16 09:41 am (UTC)