Politically downcast

[luzula]

I just had a political discussion with my mom. Maybe I should know better by now--I just feel downcast now. The thing is, the things that she thinks are problems (refugees, poverty, and ethnic conflicts, mainly) really are problems. But...I just hate the way she kicks downwards instead of upwards, and how she can't look outside the present system. Like, the poor people are the problem. Not the rich people. And when I say this, she agrees that of course, she doesn't like banks making a huge profit, etc. But it's unrealistic of me to want to change that, whereas building walls to keep out poor people is...realistic, I guess. : /

I wish I actually believed that things were getting better. I'm aware that the world is a complicated and place (or many places, rather) and it probably isn't going to end in an apocalypse, anymore than it is going to become a utopia. I know that I'm going to keep doing the political work that I'm doing, because whatever is happening on the large scale, I can still do good work where I am. And it's satisfying work to me, it is. Just...hope is a painful, difficult thing.

Uh, can I have a hug?

Comments

[king_touchy]

Big empathy hug. I have political discussions with my mom sometimes, too. Sigh.

[luzula]

I was just talking about this very thing with my flatmates, and it turns out they, too, have problems talking politics with their moms. Yeah.

[china_shop]

*hugs and sympathy*

I can't talk politics with my mother, either.

[luzula]

Thanks! And what is this moms-and-politics thing? My two flatmates can't do it either.

[china_shop]

It might just mean that there's been a fairly big cultural/political shift in the last 30-50 years, and what seems sensible and axiomatic to them is no longer seen that way, and vice versa. Maybe?

[luzula]

That's probably part of it, but I think it's also that other parent/child issues get in the way of the discussion.

[china_shop]

True, good point. Our parents (and presumably our children) are part of our personal identity, and we feel as if their political opinions reflect on us, perhaps.

[princessofgeeks]

HUGS

And remember that all the really important things never end up on TV.

[luzula]

Thanks! *hugs back*

[jjhunter]

*offers a gentle bear hug*

Here, listening.

[luzula]

Thanks. ♥

ETA: Also, Websters 1913 delivers again: hope - to cherish a desire of good. Cherish, that's perfect. That's what you do with hope; you nurture it and hold it close to your heart.

[jjhunter]

Oh, I like that nuance very much. Thank you for sharing it!

[wintercreek]

I know those feels. You can have all the hugs.

*hug*

[luzula]

Thanks! It's good to know I'm not alone, at least. *hugs back*

[frayadjacent]

I feel you so much. Hope is painful, and hard to find authentially. The things that give me the most hope are, like you mentioned, participating in activism/organizing myself, but also learning about struggles that poor and working class people are engaged in right now. Which doesn't mean that things are getting better (I agree with you that they aren't), but seeing examples of poor people exercising power does still give me hope.

[luzula]

Thanks. It's good to know I'm not alone (well, obviously I'm not, but sometimes you just need someone to talk to about it). Yes--actually being out and doing things with other people is so much better than sitting alone and surfing the internet, which can be really depressing. /o\ Especially when you see people who are on the left but arguing (IMO) in a not-so-fruitful way.

[frayadjacent]

Yeah, fights on the left can be so nasty. In my experience drama really escalates at the local level after an upsurge of activity (like Occupy in the US). During the upsurge people get along great and are excited, then when it starts to die down they attack each other (and, in many cases, the state also attacks them).

But then on top of that is the constant pettiness and name-calling and shit-talking that the left does internationally on the internet. It always makes me want to retreat into my little corner of DW fandom, where people are relatively capable of civility.

Political conversations with parents are tough too. All the relationship baggage can make it so much harder.

*hugs*

[luzula]

Yeah, WTF is the infighting thing about. *sigh*

I haven't encountered it in my local union, which I'm grateful for--it's more something I see (and try to avoid reading) on the internet.

[seascribble]

*hugs* it's very frustrating to have conversations like that with people you're close to that show so clearly you're not in the same page about fundamental issues. I admire your dededication to your work despite that and the discouraging perspective of the larger scale.

[luzula]

Yes, exactly. I mean, I could probably have that same discussion with someone who's not my mom in a more fruitful way, partly because it hurts me that someone who is close to me thinks that way, and partly because our parent/child issues are getting in the way of the discussion. Ah well.

And thanks! *hugs back*

[umadoshi]

*hugs* That's so rough, and so frustrating to deal with. :/

[luzula]

Yeah. *sigh* Thanks for the hugs!

[spuffyduds]

Huggggggggg!

[luzula]

Thanks! *hugs back*

I need more RL hugs. *ponders where to get them*

[mific]

As Leonard Cohen said, "there is a crack in everything, that's where the light gets in."
Big hugs.

[luzula]

Thanks! *hugs*

[blnchflr]

*Huuug*!

(I'm away on vacation right now, and stopped reading news from home a week ago, as it was too fucking depressing: Some Dane SPITTING on refugees, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH MY PEOPLE??)

[luzula]

: (

One of the low points in my discussion with Mom was me saying I'd donated money to an organization helping EU migrants, and she said with disgust in her voice "You're giving money to ROMA PEOPLE?"

WTF is this coming from?? When some Swedish people are setting fire to their camps, I think other Swedish people should see it as their duty to help them.

Have a good vacation, anyway. *hugs*

[toft]

*hugs*

[luzula]

Thanks! *hugs back*

[jesse_the_k]

And here's another hug, and also a reminder that you're one of the people who are acting in the face of how hard it is to do anything! You're contributing to a better world.

The stinker is the world does improve, but on a millennial scale, a power of ten beyond our lifetimes.

[luzula]

The stinker is the world does improve, but on a millennial scale, a power of ten beyond our lifetimes.

Do you really think so? That in a thousand years things will be better? I dunno, I think climate change and biodiversity loss will have taken its toll by then. : (

Ah well. Thanks for the hug, and the encouragement. *hugs back*

[jesse_the_k]

I'm certain that human change is slow.

Which means we never survive to witness all of it.

As far as climate change, I'm surrounded by people (USA) who are proud to be anti-intellectual. You're much better equipped to assess the possibility of our survival.

OK, time for some nice soothing porn.

[riverlight]

::big hugs::

[luzula]

Thanks! *hugs back*

[desireearmfeldt]

I wish I actually believed that things were getting better.

I feel the same...

[luzula]

Yeah. I mean, the future is so hard to predict, due to the many trends/factors that we aren't aware of or can't weigh the importance of. But I feel like, on the social scale, the increasing economic inequality and lack of democratic control is really scary. That on top of population increase, climate change, and biodiversity loss is what makes me feel like things are not getting better.

What worries you most?

[desireearmfeldt]

Oh, geez, I don't even know. The climate/biodiversity/fossil fuel stuff, for sure -- because most of that's more or less irreversible, whereas with anything involving how humans organize themselves and treat each other, there's always a *chance* of making things better. The fear that we'll do something with technology that turns out to be a mistake but can't be undone (I mean, a lot of technology is great, but it's also almost always a can't-close-the-door-once-it's-opened kind of thing).

[ride-4ever.livejournal.com]

Yes! Yes! *hugs*

And cheering you on to "keep up the fight". *\0/*

[luzula]

Thanks! *hugs back*

Yeah, I'm not going to stop--doing that would make me depressed for sure.

[hurry-sundown.livejournal.com]

*hug*

Repeat as many times as you want/need.

I have learned the hard way to avoid any and all political discussions with my mom. She's a very good person, and I love her dearly. She is also product of her times, and so is socially conservative and casually discriminatory. Have I mentioned that I'm a civil rights lawyer? *headdesk*

[luzula]

What is this thing with politics and moms?? My two flatmates have the same problem. I suspect part of the problem is mother/daughter issues getting in the way of what could be a fruitful discussion if it were someone else.

And thanks! *hugs back*

[lyr]

Some days, it's really demoralizing to keep up the good fight, so that you do so is heroic and wonderful. Thanks for being you. *hug*

[luzula]

Thanks for the encouragement. *hugs back*

[keerawa.livejournal.com]

*hug*

I believe things are. I really do. A decade ago, gay marriage in the US would have been a dream. Two decades ago, I would have laughed (bitterly) if someone insisted we would have a black president. God knows there are horrible problems, but at least they are being talked about, dragged into the light, so that we as a society have some hope of making things better.

Hope is a thing with razored wings, I know. Keep fighting. It DOES make a difference.

[luzula]

Well, of course things aren't uniformly getting worse or anything. Those are good things, indeed. What worries me most is the increasing economic inequality and European tendencies towards fascism (on the social side) and climate change and loss of biodiversity (on the environmental side).

And thank you, I will. *hugs*

[tweedisgood.livejournal.com]

And I wish I could promise you that as life goes on it seems more hopeful, not sure I can though. Have a hug.

[luzula]

I dunno, I think it's the age we live in rather than the age that I am, if that makes sense. But it's true that perspectives change through life; I've certainly changed between 20 and 36.

And thanks. *hugs back*