due South story: "Tangential"

[luzula]

Title: Tangential
Pairing: Teenage Fraser/Smithbauer
Rating: R
Length: 1300 words
Summary: Why was Mark avoiding him?
Notes: For meresy's porn tag. I could probably have made this better, but well, that's the hazard of short deadlines. Not beta read. Teenage confusion and awkward sex ahead. Possibly I also need to warn for underage? In my head, they're about fifteen.

Also, please give me a title? I just can't think of one, and I need to post this, like, now. ETA: Thanks to spuffyduds for the title!

"Mark?" Benton said, interrupting Mark's loud conversation with two other boys in their class. He knew it was impolite, but he didn't care any longer. "Can I talk to you after class?"

Mark looked at him, or no, he didn't look at him. He looked past him, eyes sliding away sideways. "What do you want?"

"Just what I said." He looked steadily at Mark and saw him flinch. "To talk with you."

Just then, Mrs. Sheldon called the class to order. Mark turned away, but not before Benton saw his expression of relief. Benton sat down at this own desk, staring at his mathematics lesson. For once, he couldn't seem to solve even the easiest problem.

He and his grandparents had moved back to Inuvik a couple of months ago, after moving around for over a year, and he'd been back in the same class with Mark again. It was...different from before. Benton bit his lip and blushed, then made himself focus on the page. To get the equation for the tangent, you had to differentiate first. Yes. He began to do that, but clenched his fist when he remembered Mark ignoring him and joking with the other boys instead.

"Benton, do you need any help?" Mrs Sheldon said from over his shoulder.

"No, thank you, ma'am."

"Really? Martha convinced me you needed advanced classes, but right now I can't see much evidence of that." Her voice was cool and evaluating, and Benton flushed again, for quite another reason.

"I'm sorry, ma'am. I don't feel quite well." It wasn't a lie, not really.

"Are you coming down with something?"

"No, ma'am, I don't think so."

After class, Benton was determined not to let Mark slip away. Yesterday, Mark had gone out the door with Jim and Roger, heading for the pond to skate. Benton had not been invited.

But today, Mark had detention for throwing chewing gum at Mrs. Sheldon's back on a dare. Benton waited patiently outside the school building, focused on the door as if it was the breathing hole of a seal. It was a sunny spring day, and the melting snow dripped from the roof of the house. Idly, he broke off an icicle and sucked on it, but kept his eyes on the door.

Finally, Mark came out. Benton heard the tail end of Mrs. Sheldon's reproving voice, and then the door closed behind Mark. Mark saw him, and his eyes flicked around the schoolyard.

"Why are you avoiding me?"

"Ben, why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?" Benton said, frustrated. "I just want to talk. You didn't mind talking to me before."

"Yeah, but..." Mark circled around, trying to go around Benton, who followed him. "That was then. Don't you get it?"

"No."

"Fine, but not here. Come on." Mark grabbed him by the jacket front and pulled him into the shed where the school kept snow shovels and soccer balls and other odds and ends. It was not a large building, and they had to stand close together to fit in.

"I hope nobody saw us. Do you want everyone to know?" Mark hissed in a loud whisper.

"Know what?" Ben said. He wasn't going to give up until Mark said it.

"Are you stupid, Ben? Know that we...that we...you know." Mark's face turned red, and he mumbled, "After hockey practise. Last weekend."

"How are they going to know?"

"They will if you keep wanting to talk about it!"

"I don't want to talk about it in front of them! Why would I want to tell them about it? I just want you to stop avoiding me." Benton shifted around, wishing the shed wasn't so small, because he was finding it hard to concentrate with Mark so close. Mark shifted, too, with the only result that his knee bumped into Benton's and their jackets brushed.

"I'm not avoiding you!" This was an obvious falsehood, and Benton glared at him. Mark continued, "It's just, we have to be careful. Maybe it's all right for you. You're different, but I...I don't want to..." He trailed off.

"What do you mean, I'm different?"

Mark shrugged. They stared at each other.

"So you don't want to, I mean..." It was Benton's turn to trail off. Mark turned red again.

"Shit, Ben, I don't know. Yes. No." Then he grabbed Benton by the jacket and pulled him in.

It wasn't really a kiss as Benton imagined a kiss (not that he really knew what it was supposed to be like). It was more like mashing their mouths together, but whatever it was, it made Benton flood with heat. He leaned into Mark instinctively.

"Ow!" Mark said, shifting away from the handle of the snow shovel. Instead, he pushed Benton against the other wall. Benton's head was spinning. He'd spent the past couple of days trying to get Mark to even look him in the eye again, and now Mark was pressing close to him, putting his hands everywhere.

"Please, Ben." His breath was hot in Benton's ear, and he took Benton's hand and guided it down. Benton got his hand into Mark's clothing, until he found himself gripping Mark's...erection. Penis. Whatever he called it, it felt moist and almost hot to the touch, and hard. Benton was hard, too. They hadn't done this last time--they hadn't even taken any clothes off, just rubbed up against each other.

Benton squeezed, and Mark made a little breathless noise into his ear. It wasn't like doing it to himself, not at all--the angle was all weird and awkward, and besides, he couldn't feel if he was doing it right. But he moved his hand up and down, and felt the skin slide around, wet and slippery. Benton thought about having Mark's hand on him that way, and pressed closer to Mark, getting Mark's leg between his own. He couldn't seem to stop rubbing himself against it.

Mark was making louder noises now, his eyes closed and his mouth open, and Benton felt a thrill run through him. He was actually in control of this. He squeezed harder, moved his hand faster, and Mark cried out. Benton's hand was getting all wet, and oh, he could actually feel Mark's whole body shuddering against him, that heavy body that he'd tackled so often on the pond.

Mark went still and heavy against him, but Benton didn't want to be still, he wanted to move. Then Mark pressed his hand hard against the front of his pants, and that was that. Benton's whole body flooded with pleasure.

Afterwards, having his hand down Mark's pants was suddenly much more awkward than it had been a few minutes ago. He drew it out and tried to wipe himself off against the wall, which didn't work so well. Mark zipped up his pants, not looking at him.

"Um," Benton said. He certainly didn't feel in control anymore, and his pants were starting to feel uncomfortable. Then again, Mark didn't look as if he knew what to do either.

"See you tomorrow?" Benton swallowed, and tried a small smile. He hoped Mark wouldn't ignore him again.

Mark looked at him. His face was still flushed, and he smiled back, a little. "See you tomorrow, Ben," he mumbled, and then they came out of the shed together.

Comments

[helens78]

Mmm, awkward teenagers! :D I liked this a lot.

[mikes_grrl]

OOooo! I liked the urgency here and the contrast of Benton's confusion but innocence with Mark's shame and awareness. Somehow it mirrors them exactly as they are so many years later, in Chicago.

I liked this line a lot because it really reflects that hesitant realization of dawning sexual awareness around that age, what turns you on and what doesn't etc.:
...he could actually feel Mark's whole body shuddering against him, that heavy body that he'd tackled so often on the pond.

And sweet boy!sex - how young and fumbling they are. It was erotic but in such an earnest, youthful way. Hand jobs probably aren't supposed to make you go "dhaawwww, cute!" but this one did. :)

[jesse_the_k]

Delightful. Sweet. Hot in the best possible furtive method.

Title: Hand in Hand?

This line focused on the door as if it was the breathing hole of a seal is so cute I want to hug it.

[brigantine]

Aw, teen!Ben being all brave and earnest! <3!

[andeincascade]

Oh Luz! You've captured perfectly what is horrible and yet endearing about adolescence. Boys! I just want to smish them!

[luzula]

Thank you, I'm so glad you liked it!

Hmm, you weren't at Bitching Party, were you? I think I mixed you up with someone who was there. Her name was laura47 (common female name followed by two numbers, like yours), and she must have been surprised when I thanked her for her comment on my podfic. /o\

Oh well, I have probably done more embarrassing things in my life.

[luzula]

You give awesome feedback! See, this line:

the contrast of Benton's confusion but innocence with Mark's shame and awareness. Somehow it mirrors them exactly as they are so many years later, in Chicago.

really clarifies what I was doing. I mean, clarifies it for me. Not the bit about how it mirrors the episode (though I was trying to mirror it a little bit, but that was more about how Benton follows Mark around and bugs him until he has to take notice), but the thing about what the contrast is between them. Thank you!

I liked this line a lot because it really reflects that hesitant realization of dawning sexual awareness around that age, what turns you on and what doesn't etc.

Thanks! That's also really interesting.

[luzula]

Thank you! And I wondered if that line was too cute, but I couldn't resist it. I'm glad you liked it.

[luzula]

Thank you! Yeah, he'd be very earnest, I think.

[luzula]

Thank you! Yeah, I feel for them both--adolescence isn't an easy time.

[lamentables]

So awkward it hurts. And yet also endearing.
Nicely done :)

[luzula]

Thank you! : )

[helens78]

I wasn't, no, but maybe she'll take that as an excuse to go listen to some of your audiofic. :D *hearts*

[exbex.livejournal.com]

Very nicely done, especially your young Fraser. Sadly, I am terrible with titles, and cannot help you :( The classic Shakespeare line is fitting here; your rose of a fic won't suffer titleless, IMHO.

[tinzelda.livejournal.com]

I enjoyed this. You managed to get their interaction both adorably, painfully awkward AND hot. (sorry, don't have much help to offer by way of a title - maybe something about seeing things in a new light? Something obviously changed in the way they saw each other after being apart, and now they have to adjust for it? just an idea)

[spuffyduds.livejournal.com]

Hmm--"Tangential," maybe? Because they keep sort of--bouncing off each other and careening away at odd angles?

This is so sweet and painfully awkward, and I think I even feel worse for Mark than for Ben, who at least isn't as ashamed to want what he wants.

[malnpudl.livejournal.com]

Oh, boys. *hearts their awkward young selves like anything*

This is just perfect. :-)

I suck at titles... Growing Pains, maybe? Yeah, like I said. Not my best thing.

[malnpudl.livejournal.com]

Hmm--"Tangential," maybe? Because they keep sort of--bouncing off each other and careening away at odd angles?

Ooh, that has promise. Or "Carom" maybe, for the hockey reference? "Rebound"?

[thursdaynext-27.livejournal.com]

No idea on a title, but I enjoyed the story.

[luzula]

Thank you, glad you liked it! And yeah, someone did give me a title.

[luzula]

You managed to get their interaction both adorably, painfully awkward AND hot.

Thank you, that's pretty much what I was going for! Yeah, being a teenager really is awkward. And I ended up going with another title, but thanks for the suggestion anyway.

[luzula]

Tangential, I like that! Also, it makes it look like I had a clever plan for the story when I had Benton work on that math problem involving tangents. Hee. *goes to edit*

I am amused that you are the second person to use the phrase "painfully awkward".

Also, I was afraid at first that Mark was going to come off as too much of a jerk, so I'm glad you felt for him.

[luzula]

I ended up going with "Tangential", because I couldn't resist the math reference. But yeah, those are good, too.

[luzula]

Thank you so much! And I'm also glad that you feel for them both. When I started the story, I was afraid that Mark was going to come off as too much of a jerk.

[luzula]

I'm glad you did! Thank you.

[petronelle.livejournal.com]

Oh, *boys.* This aches in all the best and worst ways. Adolescents and adolescence are cruel.

[osaraba]

Oh this was great!!!

I don't seem to have read too many teenage!Fraser fics, and *sigh* that age is just as awkward as I remember it being.

[akite.livejournal.com]

Yes, just like that. That's how I imagine young Ben and Mark to be.

[luzula]

Yeah, I'm not sure I see this ending well for them (although I did try to end the fic on a somewhat positive note). Adolescence is cruel, yes. And thank you!

[luzula]

Thank! I'm glad you liked it. And yes, totally an awkward age--I would never want to be a teenager again.

If you want more teenage Fraser fics, I've written a fair amount (if you're interested, you can find them on my fic index, under the headings "Stories about the Fraser family and Fraser's early years" and "Snippets about the Fraser family".)

[luzula]

Oh, thank you!

[osaraba]

Oh yes! I'm definitely going to check those out. As well as all the other stuff you have there! Thanks!

[gloriana.livejournal.com]

Ah, I liked this Ben, not least because he's so straightforward about what he wants, so determined that he should be treated justly - and so sure Mark will do the right thing, too. Poor Fraser as an adult in Chicago has some of those qualities still, but you can see he's been worn down somewhat by the world.

Oh, and the comparison to him waiting for Mark the way he would at a seal hole was a perfect simile for him :)

[j-s-cavalcante.livejournal.com]

Awww...hot and sweet. Poor Benton. (P.S. I noticed how you sneaked some Math in there, Professor. :)

[luzula]

Thank you! I'm glad you liked the characterization--I wanted to parallel a little bit how they were in The Blue Line.

[luzula]

Thanks, I'm glad you liked it! And I didn't plan the math stuff--I just needed some schoolwork for Benton, and went with what I knew. : )